Tuesday, November 18, 2008

The hooker wants royalties

I did something I haven't done in a long time on Sunday. I actually taped the final table of the World Series of Poker. I haven't watched it yet but I have it available to view. I am not sure why I taped recorded it. I haven't watched poker on TV in months, except for some of the WSOP events earlier but those played in the background while I did played cards online. Plus, I saw change100 working on a laptop in the background of a shot and I kept watching the shows wondering if I would catch a glimpse of Pauly or F-Train, or Otis walking around. Yep, I didn't watch it for the poker, I watched it for the bloggers.

Now after reading one of Pauly's posts, I figure I really didn't miss much. It sounded like the better game was happening after the tournament was over and everyone was partied out. You know the scene has to be the notorious Hooker Bar at the Rio.

Tao of Poker > Existentialist Conversations with Hookers: Maelstrom at the Hooker Bar
"You guys looking for a little fun?" she said which was the standard opening line from the local strumpets.I played hardball.

"Umm, that's what we were doing before you arrived."

"So where are you from?"

I pointed to Howard. He's a proper Englishman who resides in London but I blurted out, "He's Irish and I'm from Colorado."

"What's your name?""Steve," I said. "I'm Steve from Colorado. I sell propane and propane accessories."

"What's his name?" she said as she pointed at Otis who had his head down, tucked way down that it looked like he was sleeping on the bar.

"Cameron," muttered Otis.

"Have you ever been with a black girl, Cam?"

Otis instantly raised his left hand and practically shoved his wedding ring into her face.

"I have," I said in order to rescue Otis.

"Well how about we have some fun?" she cooed.

"How much does fun cost?" I inquired.

"Depends. What do you want to do?"

At that point, both slags stroked various parts of Howard's paralyzed body. Dogs, bees, and hookers can smell fear, but Howard eschewed all of their advances.

"How much for a threesome? I want to videotape both you and her tag-teaming my Irish friend."

"What's his name?"Howard remained still and silent.

"This my friend Bartley," chimed in Otis.

"We'd both do him, but you can't videotape us," she demanded.

Before I can retort with a counter offer, she instantly changed her mind.

"O.K., you can tape us, but no faces!" she said. "I don't wanna see you getting fuckin' rich by putting that shit up on the internet."

A stripper was smart enough to be concerned about Pauly putting her on the internet but somehow I was able to prevent him putting video of me standing by an Obama sign? It is a sad day when hooker outsmart you.

Of course you should go read the whole thing. Anytime Pauly gets into existential conversations with working girls- be they strippers or hookers- you know you get a good story.

1 comment:

Dr. Pauly said...

Thanks for the plug. Your check is in the mail.